Day 22- stress eating & preparing for the week to come

My day (Monday 2/1/10) -
Have a very stressful week coming up. I am trying to steel myself for it. Today is a no-school day for our district, so I have all the kids home again. Tomorrow, I have lots of errands to run & it is my only day to do it. Then, Wednesday my son goes up to Shriners Hospital to see if he needs to schedule surgery again (will be his seventh, he is 6 years old). Then, on Thursday, my husband has surgery. It is a pretty minor thing but because they have to cut through a large muscle to get where they are going, he has to go to the hospital to do it. He will then be off for the rest of the week & the following week. ugh

Friday is traveling again, as usual, down south for a visit. Tonight is a visit too but here in town. My granddaughter is in our care as a foster child as my oldest daughter (20) is very mentally ill. I am getting nervous as the date for the permanency hearing is fast approaching. I am so unsure of what the state will do with our granddaughter (give her to her mother - they removed her at birth, so she has never really"had" her to raise yet) or leave her with us so that we may adopt her (we have had her since she was a week old, she is now almost 8 mos). Another reason I am trying to lose some serious weight so I don't look like an elephant in a suit next time we go to court.

My teenage daughter is getting ready to finish her GED next week, start work, and go to community college (she is 16, but skipping high school...I can't really explain why, because I don't know, but she is being responsible about it). So, this week she is out looking for jobs. I hope it isn't as bad out there as I hear!

So, for a stress-eater like me, this is a serious test of my eating plan!!! Lots of being out of my comfort zone (and it is funny that Tyler wrote about this just today in his blog), away from home, traveling, health issues with family members, etc etc etc. I am going to have to redouble my efforts to stay on track this week.

Ultimate goal: HALF MY SIZE BY Sept 2012
Working goal: to fit back into those size 18 pants by May 1
**NEW** Mini Goal: STAY OFF THE SCALE UNTIL WEIGH-IN DAY!
Mini Goal: take my thyroid meds more regularly!

Food:
-bowl of HN cheerios cereal & milk (275)
-Luna "Cookie" (130)
-sandwich (300) -W bread, LC cheese, ham, tomato
-FF tapioca pudding (80)
-RK treat (90)
-crackers, LC cheese, tomato (210)
-orange (86)
-Full bites (150)
-big salad with light dressing & almonds (180)
-LC meal (220)
-skinny cow ice cream (150)

total diet cokes today: 2
Calories:...1871

Daily Calorie Requirements: 2,579

500 calorie deficit: 2079
700 calorie deficit: 1879 (means "goal" ~10 months sooner!)

workout:
Well, I think I have recovered from my "work outs" this last week. It is funny, there is this post exertion fatigue (and pain!) with fibromyalgia that is kind of a self-perpetuating cycle. You don't do too much because you feel exhausted for days after, but you don't do much, so you are tired & out of shape. It is a tough cycle to break out of. You have to know just how much you can do without pushing yourself too far. I certainly cannot work out like a lot of people I read about...what is this SHRED stuff anyway??! That would put me down for a month!

However, now that I am feeling better, I have gotten a lot of work done that has been neglected in the past several days. Lots of cleaning, paperwork, work-work, etc. I know I must have burned SOME calories with that. And, I guess burning calories getting something constructive done is better than just cruisin' on the elliptic machine. I think that I will try to go for more walks. That does not tire me out as much.

Water:
50 oz

Confession of the day: (good for the soul, no?)
When I got up this morning at 4:30 with the baby, I think I ended up eating a rice krispie treat (that is not logged with yesterdays food). I dont really remember too well. But I know I ate something. But, so far, no bowls of kiddie cereal in the middle of the night for weeks now. That is amazing!

Until tomorrow,
Two

day sixteen - why it's working!!! And, playlist, as promised

My day (Tuesday 1/26/10) -Well, it's all a journey. But I am trying to figure out why, after all the many many years of dieting, trying to eat right, etc, that this time, it is finally clicking. Craving are almost non-existent most of the time. I am doing good at staying under my cal req for the day. I haven't been able to stay on a diet for more than a week in probably 10 years. Workouts could be more, but trying not to push that too hard right now due to health reasons.

I think part of it was something Tyler said on his blog (and for the life of me I cannot find it now). But, he talked about "fad" diets and slowly changing how you eat. That you can't maintain a loss if you can't maintain the diet. If you lose a bunch of weight on the carrot soup diet, how are you going to keep it off? Eat carrot soup for the rest of your life? No, you have to take the way you would eat and work with that. Now, why it took a man half my age to get through to me on that after I have been to diet clinics, counselors, nutritionists, etc I don't know. But, heck, when the student is ready the teacher will appear.

Reducing the amount of what I normally eat, tweaking it a little (low-fat/low calorie versions), and slowly adding healthy foods in at the same time seems to work. One change I made is I have a big salad every night with dinner. I mean a BIG one! I also eat fruit at least once a day (usually at the 3:00 slump time). I have been on plenty of diets where I quit eating "bad stuff" cold turkey (pun intended!) and the older I get, the harder it is. Impossible, in fact.

That being said, something I have always struggled with is cooking on a consistent basis. I am sporadic about it normally and we do eat prepared foods regularly. I just cannot cook an organic, vegetarian dinner every night! I just wont keep it up! So, lean cuisines (and the like) have worked for me. My husband and I eat them and a large salad at night (after we have our Full Bar supplement). It seems to work. I know that frozen diet dinners are not the most nutritious things, but they are portion controlled and the big salad give us some fresh, healthy food as well.

And, finally, I have to say that blogging has played a HUGE role in all this as well. I LOVE IT! People who follow me must say "DAMN, she posts every day!" But that is what is takes for me. It seems to work where nothing else has (WW weigh-ins, Jenny Craig check-ins, food logs for the nutritionist, online support groups, etc etc). So I am going to keep posting (and reading the blogs I follow, which is now about 10). Hopefully, it will be helpful to someone. And, I promise to title my posts better from now on, rather that just "day xxx" :-)

Ultimate goal: HALF MY SIZE BY Sept 2012
Working goal: to fit back into those size 18 pants by May 1
Mini Goal: more water!
Mini Goal: take my thyroid meds more regularly!

Food:
-bowl of HN cheerios cereal & milk (275)
-Quaker oats bkfst bar (175)
-crackers, LC cheese (95)
-lg orange (86) - it has been a very "snacky" morning
-LC sandwich (330)
-lg banana (120)
-crackers, LC cheese (95)
-Full bar (150)
-big salad with light dressing & almonds (200)
-LC meal (220)
-skinny cow ice cream sandwich (150)
-100 cal bag of popcorn (100)

total diet cokes today: 1.5
Calories:...1996 (a little bit over, but still under 500 deficit. The snacky morning got me...one 120 calorie banana too many for the day!)

Note on diet cokes: OK, I have been doing good at keeping them to 2 a day. Yesterday I went up to three and woke up today feeling like crap! Coincidence?

Your Daily Calorie Requirements Are: 2,579 Calories Per Day

500 calorie deficit: 2079
700 calorie deficit: 1879 (means "goal" ~10 months sooner!)

workout:
No workout today (unless you count carrying around a 20# baby most of the day!) I will probably do some crunches tonight.

Yesterday I said I would post my current playlist, so here it is (the starred songs are ones I almost always shuffle to during a workout, when I need an extra umph):

The Way You Move – Outkast

Ironic –Alanis Morissette

Bring Me Some Water – Melissa Ethridge

Lose Yourself – Eminem **

Superman – Eminem

I Would Die For You – Prince

Bitch - Alanis Morissette

My Humps – Black Eye Peas **

You Oughtta Know - Alanis Morissette **

Shake That – Eminem

I Will Survive – Aretha Franklin

Back In The Saddle Again – Aerosmith

Wild Thing – Sam Kennison

Dude Looks Like A Lady – Aerosmith

Walk This Way – Aerosmith

Mustang Sally – Grand Funk Railroad

Love Is A Battlefield – Pat Benetar & Queen Latifa (Remix)

Suck My Kiss – Red Hot Chili Peppers

‘Till I Collapse –Eminem & Nate Dogg

Bombs Over Bagdad – Outkast ***

Super Bitch – Christina Aguilera

The New Workout Plan – Kanye West

We Are The Champions – Queen

Pour Some Sugar On Me – Def Leppard

Booty – Erykah Badu

Fat Bottomed Girls – Queen

Pump It – Black Eyed Peas

My MP3 player list is VERY eclectic. I have Elvis, Harry Connick Jr, Eminem, Al Greene, George Michael, Garth Brooks, Indie Arie, Meat Loaf, The Monkeys, Tone Loc, James Brown....just to name a few. So, my workout list is pretty eclectic as well ;-)

Water:
ended up with 60 oz for the day!!!! {Angi, aren't you proud? :D}

Confession of the day: (good for the soul, no?)
I think the pictures yesterday are enough "confession" for me for a day or two. Can't get into anything right now.